Hollywood. Lies.

The Breakfast Club. Miss Congeniality. Never Been Kissed (I felt particularly cheated during this one- Drew Barrymore had me). Clueless.
All the romantic comedies and their “want man, buy lipstick” formulas (‘formulae’? I don’t know- my job is to look pretty, not to have good grammar) have been summed up in this article– an oldie, but still a goodie.
As well as by this comic, aptly titled She’s All That:

Sometimes these Cyanide and Happiness guys do get it right.